My 5 favorite picture books for teaching kids about self esteem

Self-esteem is something many kids (and adults!) struggle with. It’s the ability to see the good in ourselves, be proud of ourselves and believe in ourselves, even when we may not, at first, succeed.

This is a daunting task for many kids, though. Does this scenario sound familiar? Your child (or student) makes a simple mistake or is redirected by an adult and immediately starts beating themselves up, berating themselves for messing up or calling themselves ugly names. Despite your best efforts to the contrary, this is a trap many of our kids fall into, and it’s not healthy for a lot of reasons.

According to the American Psychological Association, having high self-esteem is critical to our mental health and well-being. In fact, studies show that low self-esteem is highly correlated to depression, anxiety disorders, substance abuse, eating disorders and suicidal ideation.

So how do we help kids beef up their self-esteem? It’s all about changing thought patterns. Remember, our thoughts determine our feelings and behaviors or actions (see the Cognitive Triangle below). If the cycle begins with negative thoughts, it’s more likely that the feelings and behaviors that follow will also be negative. However, if the cycle begins positive, then positive feelings and behaviors are more likely to follow.

So how do we encourage kids to engage in positive self-talk (or teach them what that even means!) or springboard a discussion on self-esteem? Check out my list of favorite picture books on this topic below.

Giraffes Can’t Dance by Giles Andreae

This is the story of Gerald the giraffe. He has dreams of dancing, but his knobby knees and spindly legs make it hard for him UNTIL he gets some encouraging words from a friend.

Fiona Flamingo by Rachael Urrutia Chu

Fiona gets made fun of for being the only flamingo with different colored feathers. Find out how she finally learns to accept being different than the rest of her flock in this wonderful story that also has a great message about emotional intelligence.

Ricky, the Rock that Couldn’t Roll by Jay Miletsky

Ricky is the only one of his rock friends who can’t play around and roll. Why? Because he has one flat side. Determined to include their friend, the other rocks set out to help Ricky roll.

Elmer by David McKee

There’s something different about Elmer, and although, the other elephants love Elmer for those differences, he just wants to look like everyone else. Find out how Elmer learns to love himself and be celebrated by all his friends when he sets out to look like all the other elephants.

Pink is for Boys by Robb Pearlman

With a group of very relatable characters, this book sets out to bust gender stereotypes by encouraging boys and girls to do what they love and express themselves in every color of the rainbow.